i found the cure to growing older. and you're the only place that feels like home.
just so you know, you'll never know-
and some secrets weren't meant to be told but i found the cure to growing older
ohh god. mike is cooking bacon and it smells like burning wet dog and i am about to vomit all over everything because it seems like instead of hangovers i get an increased sense of smell and i don't even know why the fucking bacon smells like that.
so last night rick came over and was like hey come watch fight by the pool cus he set up the projector and whatever so we got some booze, worked out. i ate my pills and showered. everything after that is possibly not real. the pool area was like a fucking drive in theater and somehow i managed not to die or trip on my heels and fall in the pool. i drank a lot of wine some heinekens. even in my drunken high stupor i could have put money on the fight cus i totally said cain was going to clean house and you know what happened? I WAS RIGHT BECAUSE I AM INCAPABLE OF BEING WRONG.
i made rick tell me stories of being locked up and haha i asked him if he had been raped and he told me about the prison riot when a black guy got killed and other shit. anyways it was around that time that i became royally fucked up and i had to keep going inside and i don't know why but i ended up throwing up a lot and i remember throwing up EVERYWHERE and going back to the pool. eventually i couldnt even smoke anymore so i went to bed and mike came inside and read a book and i made soup and shoved as much food in my mouth as i could because for some reason whenever i get really drunk my stupid brain thinks that if i eat a lot of salty food really quick that i will not be sick or drunk anymore. it NEVER works.
i woke up at fucking six in the morning and kept tossing and turning but that turned out to be a stupid idea because i was still drunk and probably i would have thrown up if i did not go back to sleep so i fell asleep and woke up because i had cramps because i am shedding my uterine lining again.
oh and last night's text messaging? of epic proportions. i am fond of a few of them. i kind of cannot wait to go to work either. time for breakfast!
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