im lying just to keep you here.

i decided i am in love with george eads more commonly known as nick stokes or the really hot guy from csi. basically if there was someone i was going to drop my entire life for it's gonna be this guy even though he has a retarded name. i've only met one george in my life and he turned out to be one of the most awesome guys i've ever known. i don't know if george was his real name anyways cus he was a foreigner so it was probably his given name. anyways. he contributed to that bad karma post i wrote about (see: redacted.) 
whatevs. i wish i could run into that guy again but he's stuck in a foreign country for a few years and either way i deleted the last form of communication anyways. 


so i might be dying my hair red in the next week or so. i decided the current hair situation really fucking sucks. i also decided i probably will never look good as a blonde unless i go on the cocaine diet. ill keep you posted on that.  oh yeah and if you live in california i might be seeing you guys soon. see, the skank that is my sister is currently going through some difficulties and i havent really been a part of any of my family's lives since like, that christmas my mom was going to leave my dad so we ran off to santa monica and spent christmas alone. that's when i decided holidays are fucking retarded. anyways, she got back with my dad and he continued to be the idiot he was when we were growing up. that was back in the days when he thought he was hearing voices and reading the bible.
that was around when i was like uh you guys are silly and i am not going to be involved with you, sorry!
i've matured a lot since those days and i've lost a couple people to death n whatnot. i know what it is like to have someone alive one day and the next day they aren't there anymore forever and i really just feel like i need to go to california again so with that being said I AM PLANNING ON GOING TO CALIFORNIA IF IT FUCKING KILLS ME. 


need to get ready to go eat some hibachi grill sushi stuff. catch ya on the flipside.